Quote of the Week

"I'd trade my family and my friends for an endless happy hour"
Everclear

"The difference between wrestling and gay sex is mostly mental." Ryan Dunn

"I have the most physically demanding job at Hyatt BAR NONE" Adam Lane 10S

"Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake" Napoleon

"Champagne for my real friends, real pain for my sham friends" Fall Out Boy

"I feel more like I do now, than I did before I got here" Roger Mack

"I feel better all over more than anywhere else" Roger Mack

"I like simple pleasures, like butter in my ass, lollipops in my mouth. That's just me. That's just something I enjoy" Floyd Gandolli

"I have two things in the world...my word and my balls... and I don't break neither one of them for nobody" Tony Montana

"The amount of liquor I drank last night, would have killed a small to medium sized Asian family" Brian Brown

"Fat, drunk, and stupid is no way to go through life, son" Dean Wormer

"Noone has ever satisfied me like Aaron West" Jessica Alba

"Anything else is always something better" Klogan the Bartender

"Everything ends badly, otherwise it wouldn't end" Klogan the Bartender

"If your parents never had children, chances are you won't either" Dick Cavett

"That John Denver's full of shit" Jim Carrey Dumb and Dumber

"Your Killin me Smalls" Ham

"The face of a child can say it all, especially the mouth part of the face" Jack Handey

Text Messaging

I'm not one to halt the charge of technology, but I also think you should be able to control yourself and the use of your "new" technology. Take for example text messaging. I know it's not exactly a new technology, nor does it take MENSA brain powers to pull it off. Unfortunately, our breatheran from the south cannot figure out how to not send me multiple, nonsense text messages daily. I also know my name is the first in a lot of peoples phone lists, but if it wasn't me receiving these text messages, some other poor sap would have to take the garbled text and symbols. My advice: If your not smart enough to control what you send over text message or who you send your text message to, DON'T send them, you idiots. That's my piece.

The "Clean Sanchez"

A lot has been written about the "Dirty Sanchez", if you don't know what it is your lucky. Obviously most people reading this blog know not only what a dirty sanchez is, but have tried to pull one. Unfortunately for the intern Toby, we created a new one we have dubbed the "Clean Sanchez", which is when you rub lady speed stick across someones upper lip while they are passed out. Let's just say "Tobicho", did not take it too well, and in fact was very close to punching me in the face. I hereby retire from the "Clean Sanchez", but I know I have a comeback on the way. No we do not have a picture of the actual "Clean Sanchez" taking place, but maybe we'll get a few in the future.

Mississippi Women

I intercepted one of "Bobby Cha Cha Cha's" e-mail's from his ex-girlfriend at Mississippi State University. She's the one with the overactive thyroid gland. She says she misses him, hope's he's eating right and can cum back soon. I highly doubt they will allow this "huge bitch" on a commercial airplane. Maybe if you found a cargo plane shipping rice and beans down, she could hitch a ride and have a snack. Bobbie Bertle you are a sick, sick boy.
A-ron

YMCA

Young man, there's no need to feel down. I said, young man, pick yourself off the ground. I said, young man, 'cause you're in a new town. There's no need to be unhappy. Young man, there's a place you can go. I said, young man, when you're short on your dough. You can stay there, and I'm sure you will find Many ways to have a good time. It's fun to stay at the y-m-c-a. It's fun to stay at the y-m-c-a. They have everything for you men to enjoy, You can hang out with all the boys ... It's fun to stay at the y-m-c-a. It's fun to stay at the y-m-c-a. You can get yourself cleaned, you can have a good meal, You can do whatever you feel ... Young man, are you listening to me? I said, young man, what do you want to be? I said, young man, you can make real your dreams. But you got to know this one thing! No man does it all by himself. I said, young man, put your pride on the shelf, And just go there, to the y.m.c.a. I'm sure they can help you today. It's fun to stay at the y-m-c-a. It's fun to stay at the y-m-c-a. They have everything for you men to enjoy, You can hang out with all the boys ... It's fun to stay at the y-m-c-a. It's fun to stay at the y-m-c-a. You can get yourself cleaned, you can have a good meal, You can do whatever you feel ... Young man, I was once in your shoes. I said, I was down and out with the blues. I felt no man cared if I were alive. I felt the whole world was so tight ... That's when someone came up to me, And said, young man, take a walk up the street. There's a place there called the y.m.c.a. They can start you back on your way. It's fun to stay at the y-m-c-a. It's fun to stay at the y-m-c-a. They have everything for you men to enjoy, You can hang out with all the boys ... Y-m-c-a ... you'll find it at the y-m-c-a. Young man, young man, there's no need to feel down. Young man, young man, get yourself off the ground. Y-m-c-a ... you'll find it at the y-m-c-a. Young man, young man, there's no need to feel down. Young man, young man, get yourself off the ground. Y-m-c-a ... just go to the y-m-c-a. Young man, young man, are you listening to me? Young man, young man, what do you wanna be?

Incubus Thursday December 1st, 2005

Nothing too exciting to post just yet. Incubus December 1st 2005, for all those who are going, can't wait. For those who are not, "mala tuya." We don't get too many good band coming to Puerto Rico, so when Incubus stops by you gotta jump on that one. Even though I didn't love their last album, or get any of their songs tattooed on my arms, Sorry Myron, we gotta check this one out. You will get updates between now and December, 1 on who is going, and how much beer we are bringing.
Well we are about one week out on the incubus concert. We have all six tickets confirmed. Myself, Toby gets a free ticket because he kicked my ass in football this week. Myron is the one who brought up the concert, he is a confirmed participant. Brenda is always in for a good old fashion drinking and carousing. YoYo is in, although he doesn't sound as excited to go as everyone else, you better get fired up you Cabrone, this is going to be the party of the season. And we fill the last space with Millie. She did not want to go when it was just an incubus concert on Thursday December 1st. She has class until 8, and won't get to enjoy the full pre concert party, but once she found out her favorite band was opening up the concert, she is all about it now. I'll let you know as updates take place.

Well Concert was great I will post a picture tomorrow. Played all the hits besides "warning" my favorite song, those no talent ass clowns. The final participtaion list was
1. Aaron West
2. Tobicho Baldwin
3. Huxy
4. Metal Face
5. Boricua
6. Some fat chick Myron sold the ticket to at the zero hour

Myron, you certainly have a way with the fat chicks. I wish I was cool and had a set list or some great pictures or some story about getting drunk with the band at 5 a.m. in downtown San Juan. But I don't, damn it.
A-ron

Senor Frog's Incident Summer 2005

A major reason for this blog was to propose a story and have witnesses and outside parties provide their 2 cents when it comes to the people involved. A perfect example of a story would be the famous "Fight" at Senor Frog's in the summer of 2005. What I am about to tell you is the events in my words, Aaron West, a minor player in my opinion, but a major player according to some of the other parties involed. So, we are at a bar/restaurant in Old San Juan called Senor Frog's. Many people reading this have probably been to a bar like this. Drunk cruise ship girls, $5.00 beers, packed danced floors, plastic "yards" full of any alcohol you could think of. Well on the night in question "see I've been arrested before and know how to speak the language", Myself and a few residents of the great commonwealth of Puerto Rico went to Senor Frog's and had a few alcohlic beverages. I was drinking Cuba libre's or Rum and cokes for the layperson and I was with Adam Lane, Brooks West, Stacy and Brenda. The music is playing and it is my turn to buy the drinks, you see Stacy and I were pretty much the only ones drinking, Brooks, Brenda and Adam had either slowed down or were drinking agua fria at this point. I turn to Stacy and ask if she wants another drink. She turns to me and tells me it's my turn to buy, so I turn to leave for the bar 17 feet away. Brooks West asks me "if I was ready to go", I shrugged him off, said it was early and headed to the bar. Now at a crowded Senor Frog's getting a drink is like pulling teeth, you got 3 bar tenders, who don't speak English trying to serve 500 hundred screaming Gringos and Puertoriquenos. So, I get the 2 drinks in like 3 and 1/2 minutes, a personal record. As a return to my spot to hand Stacy her drink I get an earful from 2 people from my group, "where were you?", "we were about to throw down", "you ran away". I, with a surprised look on my face, ask "Run from what", I just bought drinks. I am then hurried out of the bar, unable to finish my Rum and Coke. We get outside and I ask, "What the hell was that?", "Why did we leave, my favorite Britney Spears song just came on?", I still had half of an $8 Rum and Coke. That's when I get a sob story about how six guys, who Brooks bumped into, made a fake punching motion at the back of Brooks head when he wasn't looking. Adam saw this and approched the gentlemen and asked them if they had a problem. I guess this is when they ran back to where I was and Brooks asked if I was "Ready to go"", which I wasn't, I was getting another drink. I say I never run from a fight. Hell, I'm sure I have gotten in more stupid almost fights then all the people reading this post combined. I am looking for a response to this sorrid tale of whoa, that was the Senor Frog's "Fight " of Summer of 2005. If you check the comments after this post, I'm sure you'll see other versions of this tale. I'm hoping some of the details match mine. Also, if you've ever seen me run from a fight, I'd like to invite you to write a quick post about it, or on the contrary if you have seen me get into any similar situations, please let me know. I am putting myself and the situation out there for the public to decide.
Aaron "Joe Louis" West

Ferris State Alumni 2005 30 years on top

Well what can you say about the F.S.U. alumni tournament. A lot, I'm writing about it right now. First I want to give out the awards.
Craziest thing done at alumni: Landslide winner Andrew Dobbins for thinking of new and creative ways to dispose of his used beer mug.
Drunkest Guy award: Brian Moore sleeping on random peoples couches, and making your "pledge" pee in the neighbors living room, yeah hands down winner.
Expose yourself for no reason winner: Brian Brown wins every year no reason to even put up a fight for this award if Brian Brown is around
Alumni of the Year: Jeremy Beck, his first appearance was a balancing act of drinking, playing golf, and being the coldest guy in the history of hotel rooms. Always remember "the window was open", and "Black Girl"
I'd like to thank all the participants, invite everyone back for the 2006 Alumni extravaganza, and would like to leave you with some words to live by "Shut your mouth, when your talking to me"
A-ron

Oriental Pro-Am Champion

Hey un mil quiento dollares? How much is that in pesos? I don't know either. What am I going to do with the phallic symbol of a trophy? And why is everyone laughing and smiling in the picture but me? Thought I'd throw this post in just to get a few reactions. There's got to be at least 5 smart ass comments about this one. Heck, I've got a few, I'm trying to hold myself back right now from giving anyone, anymore ammunition.

Millie and I in the Dominican Republic

As you can tell we had a wonderful 5 day trip to the Dominican Republic. I think I may have got a touch to much sun, take a look at my skin in this picture so dark and so rough. Also, am I putting on a few lbs? I think the rotation on the trip of Presidente, Pina Colado, Mai Tai, Amaretto Colada, Rum Puch and then start over again was making me look a touch bloated.
What do you think? Please comment.

Interns and Drinking

Well as you can see after only 3 months by myself at Dorado Beach after Seth Henrich left we brought in an intern. Damn kids from Ferris State drink too much, those bottles we are holding are rootbeer I swear. I'm sure there will be a post or two about "To-Bicho's" adventures in Puerto Rico, he's alread thrown up in a car, and played battleship at 3 a.m. at Denny's in Bayamon, what an idiot.

Interns from Indiana can also wrestle Caiman alligators. We have a nice video of our staff trying to catch an alligator with a ball retriever and a rope. Let's just say Toby got a little excited and the words "uhh huh, pull it, pull it, pull it, uhhh yeah, you got it, ohhhhhhhhhhhhh, What the Fuck" were uttered. A. Who thought you could catch an alligator with a ball retriever, and 50 feet of rope. 2. Why did the inter video tape it and then give a porno like description of the events taking place.
D. Why are their alligators in Puerto Rico and why is the golf staff trying to catch them?

Huge T.V. no cattle

Here it is, and who says staff housing has to be a dump. Had to buy the stupid plant to hide the 80 wires climbing up the wall for all the electronic equipment powering this bad boy, now if I could only figure out how to work the damn Panasonic DVR.